Screw You, Corona!
“Reflections of a very un-serious young man in extremely very serious times”
Those Were the Days My Friends
It’s not exactly the cup of tea we are mentioning in this article, because if we share the original photo, the people hanging out in this coffee shop might get arrested.
I was practicing my favorite hobby these days, which is sexting, and during rearranging my nudes, deleting the ones below average, and reusing some other ones, I found myself diving into the pictures I had on my phone and going back farther and farther. A very normal picture of a glass of tea stopped me, I paid five pounds for it because the owner of the café was basically a thief, and it was enough to open all the gates of memories, memories that were one day my typical lifestyle which I didn’t even like!
I remembered many things just by seeing this picture; I remembered the arguments that would strike among the parties of our gathering about everything in the world, I remembered the projects and ideas that came up in a gathering ruled by a glass of tea, we seriously believed we’d start up projects that were worth millions when we ordered tea because it was the cheapest thing we can get a cigarette or two with, I remembered every time someone said “Are we here to spend time with our phones?” which was sufficient to make anyone jump in the middle, and talk with us about any topic in the world without any logical reason, how the hell did we get here!
All of a sudden, boom! It was all taken away; feels like you’re totally the butt of the joke… Mr. thief/café owner, what about that cheap glass of tea? Nope… What about a day spent in crying, sadness and sharing grief? We’re closed… What about that classic macaroni mix we used to get from Baba Abdu right by the café? These were the old times… With me not knowing when it was all going to be fixed, I had to think of a way to survive at home with the absence of my social life filled with sweet gatherings, glasses of tea, and single cigarettes; whether it be by making some time to communicate with people or play with them online, or just casually dropping some animals’ sounds impressions in chats with my friends… don’t worry, they know I always do that, because they respond with other animals’ sounds and we make a whole conversation, as if we’re these animals….
Of course I am not yet capable of feeling the same happiness I felt when I was physically with people, but social distancing has called me and I took the call.
From the Bed to the Bed, and In Between Takes I Pass by the Bed
A sentence that summarizes how my day goes! I consider myself lucky that I still have a life, and have things to do and learn at the moment. As long as I am able to keep away the idea that everything is meaningless now, and that it’s all down to hell from here on so just go get yourself some ice cream, leave it all, and bless that belly with some sugar; but no, I don’t do that! Or, at least, not all the time hehehehe….
A few times, which were actually not a few at all, I felt that quarantine is a gift to the world; I don’t know if I’m just intentionally making rainbows out of storms to please myself and sleep comfortably, or if this is actually how it is… but it’s a phase of serenity and calmness that the whole world is sharing with you, and you’re all staying in your beds in the same time; you don’t need to focus on anything else in the world now other than yourself and making your bed, and that’s why I consider it one of the phases that have affected my thinking the most on a general basis, and was a reason for me to gain many skills. It was an opportunity for me to know what I actually want to do, and what I need to work on.
I’m the king of my day! I decide when to sleep! When to work! What I want to do today! I am not afraid of wasting my day, because it’s an achievement for the whole humanity that I am staying at home…. And I want some shit in return… you hear me? Government!!!
I don’t know if the amount of satisfaction I have about this period is in result of me somehow finding myself in it, or if it actually has some positive aspects… we’ll just have to wait and see.
Shorts, an Undershirt and a Cap
Regardless of the fact that this is my uniform nowadays, but the shorts, undershirt and cap that I am focusing on and analyzing my impressions towards at the current time, are my body, mind and spirit.
For starters, I am a person who doesn’t really know how to understand his body, mind and spirit; I feel certain feelings and emotions towards the three of them and evaluate their condition with myself, I still don’t have the gift of knowing how to communicate with them in a way more professional than these games I’m playing.
In the meantime, for some reason that I don’t understand, I don’t get any messages from my body other than that it’s happy and comfortable, because I am not consuming it much in anything but the walks between my room and the kitchen… I used to sometimes wake up with a bad feeling towards my body that I don’t know the source of, but this has disappeared now. I am trying to analyze more the difference that has happened and made me receive some positive signals from my body this whole period, but I am still searching.
My mind is working effectively, doing the needed tasks and is capable of giving the usual produce; many times, I need an enthusiastic push to be able to get things out, just like I get something out of the freezer and give it time to melt and start heating it immediately, and some other times my mind starts filling up with news like those saying it’s all going to get worse, say bye to your loved ones, and hug things tightly… I have to take a pause to be able to release this negative energy in any way possible, even if I will watch “Keeping Up With the Kardashians”, and I get in the zone afterwards and I am able to get back to what I was doing.
My spirit is going through an existential crisis at the moment, a crisis making me beg for some passion back, because no matter what I do I don’t feel happy enough because I am unstable spiritually, the choices that I used to build my spiritual orgasm on, like going to a party or doing something that would make me happy and pleased with myself… are not available anymore; and the available choices at home can’t be applied in the home environment I am in, so I’m still struggling.
In the end, I am sitting in my bed, writing these words and reading them over and over, and the mere act of getting them out of my brain and reading them is a nice experience in its essence, and I don’t think I would have gone through it without this quarantine we’re facing due to the current crisis. I am convinced that our experiences as minorities in the middle of the current crisis are important for history when we don’t exist anymore, so I am happy I am doing this and participating in it.
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